Friday, June 05, 2009

Against Despair


I don't like blogging when things are bad. Not that things need to be sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows for this, but I've started to realize that sometimes it's better simply not to acknowledge some of the negative aspects of life. I'm a person who dwells on things, and sometimes writing them out makes them real.

Thus, the radio silence around here as of late.

Things could be worse. *knocks wood* I have an unfortunate habit of manifesting my mental and emotional stresses with physical symptoms. My left arm went numb for about six days last week. It was very strange, and very uncomfortable. I couldn't knit (or do any number of other things)...and since knitting is my stress buster of choice, the feeling just kept perpetuating itself.

This time of year is always hard for me. I just don't know what to do with myself, and my end of year aimlessness is combining with my fear/anxiety (most of which is house related this year) to make me listless. I could accomplish so much right now, and I simply...have not.

Things still aren't great, but I'll survive.

I don't have any other choice.

2 comments:

Moon Torbett said...

Maybe since you've acknowledged it here in writing, it'll be like patting a dog on the head and sending it on its way . . . far away.
Hugs and chocolate to you!

Castor Rouge said...

May I make a suggestion, bootleg documentaries. I like to look for them on Youtube or elsewhere and watch them now and again. It's educational, so even as a mode of procrastination it has a redeeming value, and the reenactors or frequent tours of ruins, etc. remind me of SMATH, in an off beat sort of way.

Might I suggest Niall Ferguson's War of the World? There aren't the costumed actors a la HHP but it has it's moments. It's a far cry from your paper on race and Orkientalism I'm sure, but there is an interesting racial thread therein. In any case I can only hope grainy footage has the relaxing effect on you that it has on me. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vP_X7cb-gwU